We often learn skills in professional settings that quietly reshape how we show up in everyday life. For me, buyer facilitation training was one of those game-changers.
Recently, I had two very different experiences that brought this home.
Healing Through Horses and Questions
I visited Hearts Landing Ranch in Sacramento, a place that helps people heal from trauma through equine psychotherapy. Survivors of human trafficking, veterans with PTSD, and others come there to reconnect with themselves with the help of horses and compassionate counselors.
As I spoke with one of the counselors, I was struck by her language. “We ask a lot of open-ended questions,” she said. “We focus on building trust. You never want to assume anything about what someone needs.”
It honestly felt like she’d been through the same facilitation training I had. Different context, same core principle: deep understanding begins with curiosity, not conclusions.
Coaching My Son Without Preaching
Around the same time, my daughter asked if I could talk to her older brother, her roommate, about pulling more weight around the house. So my wife and I took him to lunch.
Instead of telling him what to do, I leaned into the method: open questions, calm presence, no judgment. I started with, “Here’s what your sister’s been feeling. How does that land with you?” From there, he reflected. He recognized the gap. And best of all, he came up with his own solutions. I simply closed with, “So what are your next steps?”
One Skill. Endless Application
These weren’t sales calls. They were real moments in life. And yet, the same buyer facilitation principles applied: ask, listen, build trust, and guide. Not push people to insight.
Sometimes the most powerful conversations don’t come from having all the answers—but from having the right questions.
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